Stacey Hanke | Elevating Influence: How Leaders Can Stand Out in a Noisy World

Dallas Burnett: 00:00:00

Hey everybody.

Dallas Burnett: 00:00:00

We're talking to Stacey Hanke today.

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What an amazing woman.

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She is a renowned executive mentor and communication expert who's transformed the

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way leaders connect and influence others with incredible stories from her journey,

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including the beginnings in voiceover, her work at fortune 500 companies.

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Oh my goodness.

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Stacey is a great new friend of mine.

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You don't want to miss this incredible conversation.

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Welcome to The Last 10%.

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Your host, Dallas Burnett, dives into incredible conversations that will inspire

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you to finish well and finish strong.

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Listen as guests share their journeys and valuable advice on living in The Last 10%.

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If you are a leader, a coach, a business owner, or someone looking

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to level up, visit TheLast10p.

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com You are in the right place.

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Remember, you can give 90 percent effort and make it a long way, but it's finding

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out how to unlock the last 10 percent that makes all the difference in your

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life, your relationships, your work.

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Now, here's Dallas.

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Welcome.

Dallas Burnett: 00:01:09

Welcome.

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Welcome.

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I am Dallas Burnett sitting in my 1905 Koch brothers barber

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chair in thrive studios.

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But more importantly today, we have a great guest.

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We're talking about influence.

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Yes.

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All things influenced today, which I know our listeners

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are going to be excited about.

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Stacey is a hall of fame, professional speaker and

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bestselling author known for her powerful model that helps leaders communicate

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with confidence and authenticity.

Dallas Burnett: 00:01:41

Welcome to the show, Stacey.

Stacey Hanke: 00:01:43

my goodness.

Stacey Hanke: 00:01:43

Thank you.

Stacey Hanke: 00:01:44

How can I top that intro?

Stacey Hanke: 00:01:46

You give me that opportunity to motivate myself, to give myself

Stacey Hanke: 00:01:51

a 10 percent level up here.

Dallas Burnett: 00:01:53

That's awesome.

Dallas Burnett: 00:01:54

Well, I am so excited.

Dallas Burnett: 00:01:56

We've been excited to have you on the show because this is a topic that I

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think our listeners are going to love.

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You are an expert on influence and we're talking a lot about before the

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show, you've been doing this and this speaking and consulting has been growing

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and growing over the last, number of years and you guys are just exploding.

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So you actually.

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Have an announcement to make because you have a book coming out.

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So tell us a little bit about what's going on in your world right now with that.

Stacey Hanke: 00:02:24

I do.

Stacey Hanke: 00:02:24

And you can relate you being an author as well.

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It always is a big announcement when you can say it's actually coming out.

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It's really happening.

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So book three, it's influence

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elevated,

Dallas Burnett: 00:02:36

Wow.

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connection Monday to Monday.

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It's coming out in October.

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It's coming out.

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Because I can't turn back now.

Stacey Hanke: 00:02:42

So the more I know that, and it's a

Dallas Burnett: 00:02:45

You've got too much invested.

Stacey Hanke: 00:02:46

yeah, exactly.

Stacey Hanke: 00:02:47

It's a continuation Dallas of influence, redefine the previous book.

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And it

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really is four years, four years of research of how influence has

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changed and what it really means to elevate your influence Monday to

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Monday, which is, this is so exciting.

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Cause as I'm listening to.

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The intro to your show, we talk about in the book, instead of level up, it's

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really elevate in our world, but we talk about 10x'ing everything, playing off

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of your less than 10%,

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where can you pull in that 10%?

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So I think we're gonna have a

Stacey Hanke: 00:03:21

good conversation.

Stacey Hanke: 00:03:21

We got a lot to talk about.

Dallas Burnett: 00:03:23

I know that is so good.

Dallas Burnett: 00:03:25

I love the idea of influence.

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I remember the first time that I was really was impacted from some

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book or thoughts on influence.

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I hadn't really thought about it as, as detailed as much, but the

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psychology of influence, with, by Caldini was something that was 20

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years ago that was exposed to me.

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I was, and I read it and I was like.

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Oh my gosh.

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There's so many things that are going on that I'm not even thinking about all

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these things that are influencing me.

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And the reason I read it was I'm leading a team and I need to influence them.

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And I was looking at and saying, where can I go?

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So I'm excited to that your book, influence elevated is coming out.

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And I would love to, what you said that influence is changing.

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So now, now you've peaked my curiosity.

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Tell me a little bit about how influence is changing and how this influence

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elevated, how we talk about influence now.

Stacey Hanke: 00:04:13

There is so much noise.

Dallas Burnett: 00:04:16

Hmm.

Stacey Hanke: 00:04:17

There are so many ways that we can connect.

Stacey Hanke: 00:04:19

We're more connected now, Dallas, than we ever have, but how are we so disconnected?

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I

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It's just interesting what's happening.

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And when I say noise, It's the multitude of ways that we now can

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connect and engage with people

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from hybrid to virtual social media and personal list goes on.

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That's one set of noise.

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And then it's

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the noise.

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It's all the distractions that are going on in the world

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without getting deep into it.

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It's politics.

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It's diversity.

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It's equity.

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There's gender differences, right?

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There's so much noise.

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It's making it more difficult than ever before to stand up from the noise.

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So that not only is your message remembered, but you are remembered long

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after the conversation has occurred.

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Because influence, you don't influence.

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Rarely are you going to influence someone on the very first interaction.

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It's a series of interactions you have with someone that is consistent.

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That's one change.

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And because there's so much noise, this whole idea of elevating your

Stacey Hanke: 00:05:20

influence, and the book gets into it.

Stacey Hanke: 00:05:22

Of course, the book is very practical.

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It's very how to of whether you're a, the book is very focused for leadership.

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It's focused for

Stacey Hanke: 00:05:30

those that are people leaders, and they're really trying to drive change

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in the organization, but it's how do you stand out from that noise, whether

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you're meeting with your teams in person, Whether they're hybrid, it's

Stacey Hanke: 00:05:43

how do you stand out from the noise from clients, those that are interfacing

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with internal or external clients.

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And then even more than that, when I say Monday to Monday, this is not, I

Stacey Hanke: 00:05:54

show up on this interview with you and suddenly I turn it on and I'm at my

Stacey Hanke: 00:05:58

best behavior.

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How

Stacey Hanke: 00:05:59

do you see?

Stacey Hanke: 00:06:00

Dallas is how I treat my team.

Stacey Hanke: 00:06:02

It's how I communicate with my clients and it's how I communicate my personal life.

Stacey Hanke: 00:06:06

So when I say elevate, I look at elevating.

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It's this whole nother level.

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We've been talking, my team and I have been talking about

Stacey Hanke: 00:06:12

how to influence for years.

Stacey Hanke: 00:06:14

This elevation.

Stacey Hanke: 00:06:16

It's a space that people don't even know exist, and

Stacey Hanke: 00:06:20

we're really unpacking of what does that look like?

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And that's where the book goes.

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It shows you what does this look like?

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But then how do you get there?

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And I'll tell you, though, a big piece of it is being consistent.

Stacey Hanke: 00:06:34

Because if

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you're not consistent and people are guessing, which

Stacey Hanke: 00:06:38

Stacy's going to show up today.

Stacey Hanke: 00:06:39

It's a Monday.

Stacey Hanke: 00:06:40

It's a Tuesday.

Stacey Hanke: 00:06:41

It's a camera on day, camera off day.

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This is about

Stacey Hanke: 00:06:44

being consistent.

Stacey Hanke: 00:06:45

And when that happens, you and I were talking about it before we start recording

Stacey Hanke: 00:06:48

here, that's that level of trust.

Dallas Burnett: 00:06:52

Mm,

Stacey Hanke: 00:06:53

There

Stacey Hanke: 00:06:53

has to be consistency with our body language, our messaging, and how we

Stacey Hanke: 00:06:59

show up with all these mediums for people to say, I know what I'm always

Stacey Hanke: 00:07:03

going to get when I talk to Dallas

Dallas Burnett: 00:07:06

Mm,

Stacey Hanke: 00:07:06

and

Stacey Hanke: 00:07:07

that's hard to achieve because influence for years has been

Stacey Hanke: 00:07:11

known as you have a sales pitch.

Stacey Hanke: 00:07:14

Okay, prepare.

Stacey Hanke: 00:07:15

No, no, no, no,

Stacey Hanke: 00:07:16

no, no.

Stacey Hanke: 00:07:17

You should be practicing your communication and how

Stacey Hanke: 00:07:20

you show up all the time.

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And you should be practicing and enhancing, leveling up

Stacey Hanke: 00:07:24

your presence all the time.

Stacey Hanke: 00:07:25

That when the stakes are high, well, that's the last thing

Stacey Hanke: 00:07:28

you want to be thinking about.

Stacey Hanke: 00:07:30

You've got to be thinking

Stacey Hanke: 00:07:30

about the client, your

Stacey Hanke: 00:07:32

messaging, reading their body language.

Stacey Hanke: 00:07:35

So we get pretty deep Dallas With unpacking it.

Stacey Hanke: 00:07:38

I always share with a brand new client that has had not exposure to us.

Stacey Hanke: 00:07:41

They're like, what is this kind of experience like with you?

Stacey Hanke: 00:07:43

And I always compare it to a sport.

Stacey Hanke: 00:07:45

And I'll say,

Stacey Hanke: 00:07:46

Hey, if you've been playing golf professionally for years, we're coming in

Stacey Hanke: 00:07:50

and we're going to take you to a place you didn't even know was possible because your

Stacey Hanke: 00:07:54

subconscious just knows you've been good.

Stacey Hanke: 00:07:56

You've been good for

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so long and everyone keeps telling you how great you are.

Stacey Hanke: 00:08:01

We're just going to unpack another level for you.

Stacey Hanke: 00:08:04

That's what I love

Stacey Hanke: 00:08:05

about your 10%.

Stacey Hanke: 00:08:06

That's

Dallas Burnett: 00:08:08

finding that it's finding that last little bit that's been locked

Dallas Burnett: 00:08:11

away or hidden, that takes a lot of extra intention to get to, I love how

Dallas Burnett: 00:08:15

you talk about it because it's very intentional and I love how you describe.

Dallas Burnett: 00:08:19

That getting to the next level, because really it's true the way you describe

Dallas Burnett: 00:08:26

it, when you're going out on that sales presentation, when you're standing up

Dallas Burnett: 00:08:28

to make a speech or you're trying to put your best self forward, I used to coach my

Dallas Burnett: 00:08:33

daughters, I have three daughters and we used to coach their soccer for years and

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years because it's a little league soccer.

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And we were just constantly say, Hey, look, you, you play like you

Dallas Burnett: 00:08:42

practice, you play like you practice.

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So we're having a bad practice.

Dallas Burnett: 00:08:45

Don't expect to go out and show out on Saturday

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morning.

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And it's like exactly what you're saying is because every day is the practice,

Dallas Burnett: 00:08:53

right?

Dallas Burnett: 00:08:53

You're every day.

Dallas Burnett: 00:08:54

It's not like you go, okay, now I'm going to give a big speech.

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Now I'm gonna give a big presentation.

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So I've got to prepare for this.

Dallas Burnett: 00:09:00

What you're saying is no, no, no, no.

Dallas Burnett: 00:09:03

Every day is that preparation every day because they should be the same.

Dallas Burnett: 00:09:08

Now, obviously you have to prepare the specifics, but when you talk about being

Stacey Hanke: 00:09:12

Right.

Dallas Burnett: 00:09:13

and you talk about that consistency, it's not just

Dallas Burnett: 00:09:16

doing that on presentation day.

Dallas Burnett: 00:09:17

It's literally doing that every day at

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work when you come up and show up and you leave people.

Dallas Burnett: 00:09:21

I that idea.

Stacey Hanke: 00:09:22

you probably could

Stacey Hanke: 00:09:23

take this too from the coaching days with your daughters.

Stacey Hanke: 00:09:25

My coach always says to me, consistency.

Stacey Hanke: 00:09:28

True, true consistency is when you're doing what you say you're

Stacey Hanke: 00:09:32

doing and no one's watching.

Stacey Hanke: 00:09:34

And there's so many analogies that I use are real life stories of

Stacey Hanke: 00:09:39

professional athletes or actors, actresses of how much they practice.

Stacey Hanke: 00:09:45

No one sees the practice.

Stacey Hanke: 00:09:47

They always

Stacey Hanke: 00:09:48

see, Oh, well, they're just gifted.

Dallas Burnett: 00:09:51

Right.

Stacey Hanke: 00:09:51

No one's born an influential leader.

Stacey Hanke: 00:09:55

It's the amount of practice that they put into it.

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And here's the great news though, when it comes to how you show up in

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your presence, your body language, your messaging, every interaction you

Stacey Hanke: 00:10:07

have is an opportunity to practice.

Stacey Hanke: 00:10:10

So this isn't me telling your followers what every Tuesday you should

Stacey Hanke: 00:10:13

carve out one hour and you should practice your communication skills.

Stacey Hanke: 00:10:16

No, no, no, no, no, no.

Stacey Hanke: 00:10:17

It's every conversation you have in a day, a week.

Stacey Hanke: 00:10:21

That's a lot.

Stacey Hanke: 00:10:22

That's just to really add up.

Stacey Hanke: 00:10:24

You can practice Something about your body language or your messaging, or maybe

Stacey Hanke: 00:10:29

even your listening skills, listening is a big part of influence as well.

Stacey Hanke: 00:10:33

You can be practicing all the time so that by the time the high stakes, however

Stacey Hanke: 00:10:37

you define that, by the time the high stakes conversation comes up, you're just

Stacey Hanke: 00:10:41

at this level of this is who you are.

Dallas Burnett: 00:10:46

Yeah.

Dallas Burnett: 00:10:47

I love that.

Dallas Burnett: 00:10:49

When you think about this concept, and I think this fantastic, however,

Dallas Burnett: 00:10:54

I think it's, I think a lot of people don't achieve that level that

Dallas Burnett: 00:10:58

you say you don't even know exist.

Dallas Burnett: 00:11:00

I think it is true.

Dallas Burnett: 00:11:01

I think people have a hard time making that jump as it relates to consistency.

Dallas Burnett: 00:11:04

So if I'm a leader, I'm leading a team, I'm leaving a company,

Dallas Burnett: 00:11:08

leading an organization.

Dallas Burnett: 00:11:10

What are some things that you've seen over your career?

Dallas Burnett: 00:11:12

Over your time and helping all these leaders through the years

Dallas Burnett: 00:11:16

that they tend to miss or mess up in terms as it relates to consistency.

Dallas Burnett: 00:11:20

Because I would think that there's a lot of ways.

Dallas Burnett: 00:11:22

we all live in the world and we all have bad days.

Dallas Burnett: 00:11:25

We get up and have a flat tire or we, we're not feeling well.

Dallas Burnett: 00:11:28

And we have this responsibility to, to build trust and influence others.

Dallas Burnett: 00:11:33

So what are some pitfalls that I see as a leader

Dallas Burnett: 00:11:35

that would keep me from being consistent that you've seen?

Stacey Hanke: 00:11:38

Anytime I work with executives, a question that I'll

Stacey Hanke: 00:11:41

ask them after our work, or even at the end of a keynote, I'll ask them.

Stacey Hanke: 00:11:46

What is one thing you were not expecting from your time with me that turned out to

Stacey Hanke: 00:11:53

be the biggest return on your investment?

Dallas Burnett: 00:11:56

Hmm.

Stacey Hanke: 00:11:57

And their responses, I had no idea how powerful my body

Stacey Hanke: 00:12:02

language and messaging, how powerful it is that they are consistent.

Stacey Hanke: 00:12:07

I

Stacey Hanke: 00:12:07

never think about what I'm doing with my eyes.

Stacey Hanke: 00:12:11

What am I doing with my hands?

Stacey Hanke: 00:12:12

It's all about the message.

Stacey Hanke: 00:12:15

So that's the biggest piece is the body language and the messaging.

Stacey Hanke: 00:12:19

They're so inconsistent with leaders.

Stacey Hanke: 00:12:22

And the challenge though, here is if you ask any leader, what kind

Stacey Hanke: 00:12:26

of feedback have you received?

Stacey Hanke: 00:12:28

good,

Dallas Burnett: 00:12:29

Yeah.

Stacey Hanke: 00:12:30

great.

Stacey Hanke: 00:12:31

And no one's going to tell a CEO unless

Stacey Hanke: 00:12:35

that CEO has someone that is really loyal to them.

Stacey Hanke: 00:12:37

It's always, that was good.

Dallas Burnett: 00:12:40

right.

Dallas Burnett: 00:12:41

It's just the nature of your role.

Dallas Burnett: 00:12:43

I mean,

Dallas Burnett: 00:12:43

the, the biggest thing that the biggest thing you need is the truth.

Dallas Burnett: 00:12:46

And the hardest thing, a lot of times to find an organization is true

Dallas Burnett: 00:12:49

feedback, especially about yourself, because who wants to be the person

Dallas Burnett: 00:12:53

that's, you're signing their check and they're going to come in and

Dallas Burnett: 00:12:55

be like, Hey, yo, I got a problem.

Dallas Burnett: 00:12:56

You just screwed that up.

Dallas Burnett: 00:12:58

You're not going to get that.

Dallas Burnett: 00:12:59

not going to get it.

Stacey Hanke: 00:13:00

get that.

Stacey Hanke: 00:13:01

I was with a group I was working with last year or last year, last week was

Stacey Hanke: 00:13:05

the CEO and all of his direct reports.

Stacey Hanke: 00:13:09

So we get them all in a room and we get to them point to where

Stacey Hanke: 00:13:11

they're giving each other feedback.

Stacey Hanke: 00:13:13

And someone in the middle of the whole feedback powwow, they said,

Stacey Hanke: 00:13:17

no, one's ever told me this before.

Stacey Hanke: 00:13:19

So if you all have been seeing this all along, but no one's ever told me

Stacey Hanke: 00:13:21

this, and then everyone said the same thing, who's going to tell you, you are

Stacey Hanke: 00:13:25

the president who reports to the CEO.

Stacey Hanke: 00:13:27

No one's going to tell you this.

Stacey Hanke: 00:13:29

And that's the big piece.

Stacey Hanke: 00:13:30

The second one is we're all guilty of it.

Stacey Hanke: 00:13:34

I'm included on this one.

Stacey Hanke: 00:13:36

Our lack of brevity.

Stacey Hanke: 00:13:38

We don't know when to stop talking

Dallas Burnett: 00:13:41

Hmm.

Stacey Hanke: 00:13:42

we don't have the courage.

Stacey Hanke: 00:13:44

Or even sometimes the know how to adapt the message to make sure

Stacey Hanke: 00:13:49

it's tapping into our listeners.

Stacey Hanke: 00:13:51

Why not?

Stacey Hanke: 00:13:52

What we

Stacey Hanke: 00:13:52

want.

Stacey Hanke: 00:13:54

And that

Stacey Hanke: 00:13:54

why Dallas is, you know, why is this conversation happening now?

Stacey Hanke: 00:13:57

Why should you care?

Stacey Hanke: 00:13:59

Why should it be important to you?

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:00

Why is it important to you?

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:03

We go into these meetings.

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:06

And it's just a checklist.

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:08

It's everything I

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:09

want to do.

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:09

And then we wonder why aren't people turning their cameras on?

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:12

Why are people multitasking?

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:15

Well,

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:15

because you're boring, right?

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:17

And

Dallas Burnett: 00:14:17

Yeah.

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:17

because your message doesn't relate to them.

Dallas Burnett: 00:14:21

Yes,

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:22

The third

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:23

is the

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:23

lack of trust through our body language.

Dallas Burnett: 00:14:27

Hmm.

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:27

Who's ever told us that, if you're looking at people

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:30

and you're talking, it is hands down, that's where the trust gets built.

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:34

But if those eyes are moving like mine are right now, you

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:38

just get people second guessing.

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:41

Do I trust what you're saying?

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:43

We're

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:44

always under surveillance Dallas and the higher up that

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:47

you are in an organization, that surveillance is even more

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:51

magnified and people are watching.

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:53

they want to watch.

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:54

How do you lead?

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:55

How did you get to that VP position?

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:58

And we don't,

Stacey Hanke: 00:14:58

and even if you're not a leader, you're still under surveillance.

Stacey Hanke: 00:15:01

Here's the great news.

Stacey Hanke: 00:15:02

No matter what's going on in your life, you always have control over

Stacey Hanke: 00:15:04

your development and you've got control over what is the personal brand.

Stacey Hanke: 00:15:09

What's the reputation you want to create?

Stacey Hanke: 00:15:11

That's your decision just by how you show up and how you stay

Stacey Hanke: 00:15:15

showed up in a conversation.

Dallas Burnett: 00:15:18

I think that is, those are all great, man, those are great points.

Dallas Burnett: 00:15:23

And I think that's so difficult.

Dallas Burnett: 00:15:24

just like leaders not being told, Hey, you've said something

Dallas Burnett: 00:15:28

that doesn't make sense.

Dallas Burnett: 00:15:29

I think also the brevity piece, it is so difficult.

Dallas Burnett: 00:15:34

I think for a lot of leaders and I would, I'm going to include myself in that.

Dallas Burnett: 00:15:36

And even if you have, here's what I would say.

Dallas Burnett: 00:15:39

Some leaders.

Dallas Burnett: 00:15:40

Okay.

Dallas Burnett: 00:15:41

I'm going to just tell them what I want them to know because they need to

Dallas Burnett: 00:15:44

know this and they go down the list.

Dallas Burnett: 00:15:45

Just like you were saying, just going to boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.

Dallas Burnett: 00:15:48

And even some leaders that have really good intentions and they go, I really

Dallas Burnett: 00:15:52

want to, I want to sell this idea.

Dallas Burnett: 00:15:54

I want people to get fired up about it.

Dallas Burnett: 00:15:56

I want to do it.

Dallas Burnett: 00:15:58

My desire to.

Dallas Burnett: 00:15:59

Communicate with clarity to make sure the message that's sent is understood.

Dallas Burnett: 00:16:04

Sometimes just, I find myself speaking to a team and I'm like, shut up.

Dallas Burnett: 00:16:11

You've said enough, just let them marinate in it.

Dallas Burnett: 00:16:14

Anything more, you're just going to overwhelm them, just shut up.

Dallas Burnett: 00:16:18

And so I think that is so easy because my desire, when I sit down with

Dallas Burnett: 00:16:21

people, I want them to have clarity.

Dallas Burnett: 00:16:23

I want them to understand.

Dallas Burnett: 00:16:24

I want them to get fired up and get behind it and have that energy.

Dallas Burnett: 00:16:28

But man, there's nothing more exhausting than somebody who just won't

Dallas Burnett: 00:16:30

just be quiet and just let it sit.

Dallas Burnett: 00:16:32

So I think that letting it rest, it's almost like I'm grilling my steak.

Dallas Burnett: 00:16:35

You have

Stacey Hanke: 00:16:35

Letting it rest.

Dallas Burnett: 00:16:36

it sit for five minutes and let the, let it rest.

Dallas Burnett: 00:16:39

So I love that topic.

Dallas Burnett: 00:16:40

and then the body language too.

Dallas Burnett: 00:16:41

There's a lot of, there's so much here.

Dallas Burnett: 00:16:43

I think that's true.

Dallas Burnett: 00:16:44

That's that you're talking about that comes back to self awareness.

Dallas Burnett: 00:16:47

And it's so hard for an executive or anyone, whether you're leading a

Dallas Burnett: 00:16:52

team or leading a company to have the awareness piece, because if you don't

Dallas Burnett: 00:16:55

know, you overspeak, how will you know?

Dallas Burnett: 00:16:58

So do you have any advice for the listeners on how

Dallas Burnett: 00:17:01

to improve on those areas?

Stacey Hanke: 00:17:03

Oh, do I,

Stacey Hanke: 00:17:05

you know, and this is part of a lot of the training we do our mentoring,

Stacey Hanke: 00:17:09

my keynoting, it's seeing yourself through the eyes and ears of your

Stacey Hanke: 00:17:13

listeners, because I can tell you what I think that's just my opinion.

Stacey Hanke: 00:17:17

And we get so much feedback.

Stacey Hanke: 00:17:18

So there's always going to be the feedback you want to keep

Stacey Hanke: 00:17:20

and that you want to throw away.

Stacey Hanke: 00:17:22

It's recordings.

Stacey Hanke: 00:17:27

And I record myself on my phone a lot.

Stacey Hanke: 00:17:29

I obviously want to practice what I preach, but even if I'm on a

Stacey Hanke: 00:17:33

zoom call, I'll just put my phone down below and I'm only recording

Stacey Hanke: 00:17:37

myself inside of the conversation.

Stacey Hanke: 00:17:39

And then when I watch the playback, whether it's an audio or it's a video

Stacey Hanke: 00:17:42

playback, I'm really paying attention to how did I feel during that interaction

Stacey Hanke: 00:17:47

versus what reality States this podcast, when you send it to me, I'll watch it.

Stacey Hanke: 00:17:52

And I'll rip it apart.

Stacey Hanke: 00:17:53

I'll rip it apart.

Stacey Hanke: 00:17:54

And I'll create a list.

Stacey Hanke: 00:17:55

I have a bunch of post it notes hanging in front of me right now.

Stacey Hanke: 00:17:58

And it's tons of feedback that I'm receiving from my

Stacey Hanke: 00:18:01

coaches, my accountability

Stacey Hanke: 00:18:02

partners.

Stacey Hanke: 00:18:04

Once I accomplish it, I'll tear the post it off.

Stacey Hanke: 00:18:06

And then I'll just write another one, right?

Stacey Hanke: 00:18:08

Like it's seeing yourself through the eyes and ears of your

Stacey Hanke: 00:18:11

listeners, because without that, we don't know what we don't know.

Stacey Hanke: 00:18:14

And there is a huge disconnect of how we feel versus what reality States.

Stacey Hanke: 00:18:19

So many times my clients will say, if I know what I'm saying, I'm good when I

Stacey Hanke: 00:18:26

feel comfortable, I'm good when it's easy.

Stacey Hanke: 00:18:29

And the one thing I want your listeners to be really cautious of because you feel

Stacey Hanke: 00:18:34

good because it's easy does not guarantee.

Stacey Hanke: 00:18:39

You have, this level of influence that I'm referring to, it's

Stacey Hanke: 00:18:43

this, you've got

Stacey Hanke: 00:18:44

to be able to see yourself through the eyes and ears of your listeners

Stacey Hanke: 00:18:47

and how fortunate are we that you have a, I mean, everyone has a phone,

Stacey Hanke: 00:18:51

press record, take a look.

Stacey Hanke: 00:18:53

And then people say to me, well, it doesn't look like me.

Stacey Hanke: 00:18:57

That's a sign of how, when you, what you feel like.

Stacey Hanke: 00:19:02

Is so different sometimes from what someone is experiencing.

Stacey Hanke: 00:19:06

Well, it doesn't

Stacey Hanke: 00:19:06

sound like me.

Stacey Hanke: 00:19:07

I was working with a VP of marketing not too long ago and we were

Stacey Hanke: 00:19:10

doing some virtual mentoring and I was saying to her, well, record

Stacey Hanke: 00:19:13

yourself and we do a baseline.

Stacey Hanke: 00:19:15

Just get a very first recording on her phone.

Stacey Hanke: 00:19:18

She's watching her playback.

Stacey Hanke: 00:19:20

We're a couple of seconds into her playback and she says

Stacey Hanke: 00:19:22

to me, well, that's not me.

Stacey Hanke: 00:19:25

And I said to her, it looks like you.

Stacey Hanke: 00:19:28

I think it's you.

Stacey Hanke: 00:19:31

And we go to this place of denial and excuses.

Stacey Hanke: 00:19:36

Because it doesn't feel the same way.

Stacey Hanke: 00:19:38

So as a result, our body doesn't like to be uncomfortable.

Stacey Hanke: 00:19:42

Your subconscious will always go to a place of you're

Stacey Hanke: 00:19:46

talking, keep talking, right?

Stacey Hanke: 00:19:48

Just keep

Stacey Hanke: 00:19:48

rambling.

Stacey Hanke: 00:19:49

It

Stacey Hanke: 00:19:49

lies to us to some degree.

Stacey Hanke: 00:19:51

That's why this is so important because when you're in the middle of a high stakes

Stacey Hanke: 00:19:54

conversation and you're feeling like, wow, I'm really bad or wow, I'm really good.

Stacey Hanke: 00:20:00

You've watched yourself so many times on playback, but your level of

Stacey Hanke: 00:20:03

awareness, Dallas in the moment, where you are and how much influenced are you

Stacey Hanke: 00:20:08

really communicating in that moment?

Dallas Burnett: 00:20:12

I love that.

Dallas Burnett: 00:20:13

I think that you know, one, and I think that it's even harder because no one

Dallas Burnett: 00:20:18

likes to hear themselves on recording.

Dallas Burnett: 00:20:20

everybody's Ooh, and even if someone was recording a speech that you

Dallas Burnett: 00:20:23

made, or I've been on a podcast or anything like that, you just, you

Dallas Burnett: 00:20:26

hear it back and you're just like, Oh,

Dallas Burnett: 00:20:27

no.

Dallas Burnett: 00:20:28

But at the end of the day, that is what I think where you're talking

Dallas Burnett: 00:20:32

about not feeling comfortable, that is a space where feeling

Dallas Burnett: 00:20:36

uncomfortable is so helpful in growth.

Dallas Burnett: 00:20:39

Because I think if you expose yourself to that video and you're

Dallas Burnett: 00:20:42

like, that's not me, right.

Dallas Burnett: 00:20:44

But that's the you that everybody else is getting to experience, you know, and man,

Stacey Hanke: 00:20:49

it's wild Dallas, because sometimes we'll have

Stacey Hanke: 00:20:52

people fight the process.

Stacey Hanke: 00:20:54

Of watching themselves on playback and they're like, well, if I had, if

Stacey Hanke: 00:20:57

I knew what to say oh my goodness.

Stacey Hanke: 00:21:00

So get rid of the excuses because if you got rid of the excuses, you've

Stacey Hanke: 00:21:04

could have been practicing and elevating your influence all along.

Stacey Hanke: 00:21:08

Here's the deal.

Stacey Hanke: 00:21:09

What doesn't challenge you will never change you.

Dallas Burnett: 00:21:12

Mm.

Stacey Hanke: 00:21:13

of really get

Stacey Hanke: 00:21:14

comfortable with being uncomfortable.

Stacey Hanke: 00:21:17

I explained the work that my team and I do.

Stacey Hanke: 00:21:20

Initially you go to this place where it doesn't feel like yourself because you're

Stacey Hanke: 00:21:23

changing things about your communication.

Stacey Hanke: 00:21:25

You've never given thought to.

Stacey Hanke: 00:21:27

So you step in a pretty deep valley and while you're in that valley of

Stacey Hanke: 00:21:30

discomfort, it really does stink.

Stacey Hanke: 00:21:33

it's, it sucks.

Stacey Hanke: 00:21:34

It's not fun.

Stacey Hanke: 00:21:36

You

Stacey Hanke: 00:21:36

have To be in that valley.

Stacey Hanke: 00:21:39

To come out of it, to look back and say, I have no idea how I ever rambled.

Stacey Hanke: 00:21:44

Now that I know what I know, and I'm seeing the benefits of

Stacey Hanke: 00:21:48

people following my message,

Stacey Hanke: 00:21:50

me being able to dab my message on the fly, most important, I

Stacey Hanke: 00:21:55

consistently get people to be influenced by my recommendation,

Stacey Hanke: 00:21:59

but she had to go.

Stacey Hanke: 00:22:00

You had to step in that Valley.

Stacey Hanke: 00:22:03

To know what's on the side and Dallas, as much as we know this to be true, I

Stacey Hanke: 00:22:07

really, from the work I do, the multitude of people I interact with, I really

Stacey Hanke: 00:22:11

think this is the difference between someone who's consistently influential

Stacey Hanke: 00:22:15

and someone who's not this person.

Stacey Hanke: 00:22:18

They understand the power of practicing insanely in private,

Dallas Burnett: 00:22:26

Mm.

Stacey Hanke: 00:22:26

practice they do, there's deliberate, they're

Stacey Hanke: 00:22:29

deliberate behind what they do.

Stacey Hanke: 00:22:31

We think about any athlete.

Dallas Burnett: 00:22:35

Yes.

Stacey Hanke: 00:22:35

Athletes are

Stacey Hanke: 00:22:36

like that.

Stacey Hanke: 00:22:36

They just, we just finished the Olympics

Dallas Burnett: 00:22:39

Yes.

Stacey Hanke: 00:22:40

as I watch that, I think about the hours, the determination,

Stacey Hanke: 00:22:45

they're not willing to give up.

Stacey Hanke: 00:22:46

Now, I'm not saying you have to practice 24 7 around your communication skills.

Stacey Hanke: 00:22:51

I'm saying go off of the Nike brand.

Stacey Hanke: 00:22:55

Just do it.

Stacey Hanke: 00:22:56

Their brand simply means you don't have to win a marathon.

Stacey Hanke: 00:22:59

Just do it.

Dallas Burnett: 00:23:01

Just do it.

Stacey Hanke: 00:23:02

just start doing it and experimenting with

Stacey Hanke: 00:23:05

what's that 10 percent that I

Stacey Hanke: 00:23:07

haven't even realized was possible.

Dallas Burnett: 00:23:10

That's right.

Dallas Burnett: 00:23:11

I think that's such a great analogy.

Dallas Burnett: 00:23:13

I love the Olympics.

Dallas Burnett: 00:23:15

We, I stayed up way too.

Dallas Burnett: 00:23:16

I'm actually, I'm getting better sleep now because I was staying up too late watching

Dallas Burnett: 00:23:20

like ping pong and whatever other, crazy.

Dallas Burnett: 00:23:22

I love the track.

Dallas Burnett: 00:23:23

I'm a track

Dallas Burnett: 00:23:24

guy.

Dallas Burnett: 00:23:24

So seeing the track races is fantastic.

Dallas Burnett: 00:23:26

So I just,

Dallas Burnett: 00:23:27

I love experiencing that.

Dallas Burnett: 00:23:28

and.

Dallas Burnett: 00:23:29

To your point, the idea is that you don't necessarily have to train like

Dallas Burnett: 00:23:33

you're going to the Olympics, but what your point is solid in that is there's

Dallas Burnett: 00:23:37

intentionality behind the effort that they put in prior to the performance.

Dallas Burnett: 00:23:42

and I think that when you talk about influence, if you're leading people.

Dallas Burnett: 00:23:47

you have a responsibility as a leader to put an intentional effort to make

Dallas Burnett: 00:23:50

sure you're performing at the level that you need to perform that is something

Dallas Burnett: 00:23:55

that you're giving to your, the people that you're leading because your

Dallas Burnett: 00:23:57

performance is your gift to the people that you're leading in a lot of ways.

Dallas Burnett: 00:24:02

And if you're not putting in that effort, then you're not really leading

Dallas Burnett: 00:24:05

them well, as well as you could.

Dallas Burnett: 00:24:06

And you're not getting the most out of them because if you can't influence

Dallas Burnett: 00:24:09

them, like you're describing, then you can't get the alignment that you need to

Dallas Burnett: 00:24:14

have the performance and the excellence that everybody's trying to create.

Dallas Burnett: 00:24:17

So it really boils down to your intentionality that

Dallas Burnett: 00:24:21

you're willing to put in.

Dallas Burnett: 00:24:22

Your work and effort that you're willing to put in and being a great leader.

Dallas Burnett: 00:24:26

And I think that is, I think that's fantastic.

Dallas Burnett: 00:24:29

Now, when we talk about consistency and we talk about practicing this

Dallas Burnett: 00:24:33

delivery, I could see that some leaders might say, yes, but that's going to

Dallas Burnett: 00:24:38

come off as like salesy, or rehearsed.

Dallas Burnett: 00:24:43

it's not going to come off the way that people are going to really connect.

Dallas Burnett: 00:24:46

And I think there's a piece of that.

Dallas Burnett: 00:24:48

There's a piece of it.

Dallas Burnett: 00:24:49

The consistency is one.

Dallas Burnett: 00:24:51

I think authenticity in that consistency is real important.

Dallas Burnett: 00:24:55

And you talk about that.

Dallas Burnett: 00:24:56

So what, in, in terms of auth authenticity, how do you see

Dallas Burnett: 00:25:01

that as it relates to leaders and their communication?

Stacey Hanke: 00:25:05

You need to be.

Stacey Hanke: 00:25:07

This is what I mean by Monday to Monday, where it will not come off authentic.

Stacey Hanke: 00:25:12

If let's say brevity, we get on this recording together and suddenly

Stacey Hanke: 00:25:17

I'm going to think about brevity.

Stacey Hanke: 00:25:19

I'm going to use pauses, get rid of all the extra words that are out of context.

Stacey Hanke: 00:25:24

But five minutes before this call, I was, um, um, you know,

Stacey Hanke: 00:25:28

this was my, um, interaction with my, my, um, previous call.

Stacey Hanke: 00:25:33

So if you, this is what I mean by elevating your influence, you really

Stacey Hanke: 00:25:37

need to be doing it all the time.

Stacey Hanke: 00:25:40

Thinking

Stacey Hanke: 00:25:41

like the athlete, however, that athlete practice, like your

Stacey Hanke: 00:25:44

children, your girls soccer, however,

Stacey Hanke: 00:25:46

they practice is how you're going to perform now.

Stacey Hanke: 00:25:49

Unlike we're not athletes.

Stacey Hanke: 00:25:51

Most of us, I'm making the assumption here, but in the

Stacey Hanke: 00:25:54

corporate world or as an entrepreneur every day for you is game day.

Stacey Hanke: 00:25:59

I find that when I get coached and my coaches will just rip it

Stacey Hanke: 00:26:03

apart and there might be something there's always something new that

Stacey Hanke: 00:26:06

they're coaching on me to work on.

Stacey Hanke: 00:26:08

I will go into my personal conversations with friends, family, even with my team.

Stacey Hanke: 00:26:14

And I will put it on ultra speed because I'm thinking I just want to accomplish it.

Stacey Hanke: 00:26:19

It's just how I'm wired, but I'll accomplish that new skill.

Stacey Hanke: 00:26:24

And I'm doing it though in my personal life.

Stacey Hanke: 00:26:27

So it transfers over here, and that's where the authenticity comes into play.

Stacey Hanke: 00:26:31

That's where I tell every client when they'll call me and they'll ask, can

Stacey Hanke: 00:26:34

you teach my executives how to present?

Stacey Hanke: 00:26:36

I'm like, nope, you'll prepare them

Stacey Hanke: 00:26:38

for this big presentation.

Stacey Hanke: 00:26:39

I go, here's what I'll do.

Stacey Hanke: 00:26:41

I'm going to help them present in every conversation they're

Stacey Hanke: 00:26:44

in, even in their personal life.

Stacey Hanke: 00:26:46

And that way, when they've got their big stage moment three

Stacey Hanke: 00:26:49

months from now, they have been, this is them, this is what they've

Stacey Hanke: 00:26:53

developed.

Stacey Hanke: 00:26:54

And that to me is, where.

Stacey Hanke: 00:26:56

My work is so different around influence because I'm

Stacey Hanke: 00:27:00

not just saying, when do you need to be influential on social media?

Stacey Hanke: 00:27:03

When do you need,

Stacey Hanke: 00:27:04

I'm saying you've got to create some core skills that communicate

Stacey Hanke: 00:27:08

this trust, this connection when those core skills are built, that

Stacey Hanke: 00:27:12

is when you reach authenticity.

Stacey Hanke: 00:27:14

I've got a model that I used in my keynotes and it says consistency

Stacey Hanke: 00:27:20

plus authenticity equals trust.

Dallas Burnett: 00:27:24

Yes.

Dallas Burnett: 00:27:25

Yes.

Stacey Hanke: 00:27:25

so much, there's so much buzz right now about be authentic.

Stacey Hanke: 00:27:30

Well, what is that though?

Stacey Hanke: 00:27:31

People need to know how to do that.

Stacey Hanke: 00:27:32

And that's where my team and I come in Dallas and we'll literally sit

Stacey Hanke: 00:27:36

down with people and do recordings and video record them and show

Stacey Hanke: 00:27:40

them, okay, here's your strength.

Stacey Hanke: 00:27:41

Here's some distractions.

Stacey Hanke: 00:27:43

What do you want to change?

Stacey Hanke: 00:27:45

Because if

Stacey Hanke: 00:27:46

we don't get the commitment from them, I'm not going to,

Stacey Hanke: 00:27:47

spend time trying to do that.

Stacey Hanke: 00:27:49

enhance what you don't even want to enhance, but it

Stacey Hanke: 00:27:52

comes down to where I'll say, all right, when you go home tonight,

Stacey Hanke: 00:27:55

you're sitting around the dinner table with your family, practice brevity.

Stacey Hanke: 00:27:58

I want you to think about brevity

Dallas Burnett: 00:28:01

Right.

Stacey Hanke: 00:28:02

and if the changes happen, cause even you,

Stacey Hanke: 00:28:06

you said practices intentionality.

Stacey Hanke: 00:28:08

I think brevity is intentionality too.

Stacey Hanke: 00:28:12

So this really is about taking a look, just take a look at yourself, how you

Stacey Hanke: 00:28:17

interact with in your personal life, how you act in your professional life.

Stacey Hanke: 00:28:21

And it's about elevating everything.

Stacey Hanke: 00:28:24

So it's elevating your practice, elevating the feedback that you get.

Stacey Hanke: 00:28:28

Maybe this is also the feedback elevating the accountability of how are

Stacey Hanke: 00:28:33

you going to hold yourself accountable and what resources in your network are

Stacey Hanke: 00:28:39

you going to use to help you do that?

Stacey Hanke: 00:28:41

Because I do not think you can elevate your influence by yourself.

Dallas Burnett: 00:28:46

I agree with that.

Stacey Hanke: 00:28:47

Not only that.

Stacey Hanke: 00:28:47

it's too much work.

Stacey Hanke: 00:28:49

Don't do more work than you need to.

Dallas Burnett: 00:28:51

It's way too much.

Dallas Burnett: 00:28:52

Yeah.

Dallas Burnett: 00:28:52

And you can get there a whole lot faster if you work with others.

Dallas Burnett: 00:28:55

So I agree with that 100%.

Dallas Burnett: 00:28:56

that's why athletes have coaches and that's why business

Dallas Burnett: 00:28:59

professionals have coaches as well.

Dallas Burnett: 00:29:01

I think it's just very interesting and we've harped on the Olympics, but it's so

Dallas Burnett: 00:29:04

funny because we talk about how much those athletes practice and like 90 percent of

Dallas Burnett: 00:29:10

their time is spent practicing and only about 1 percent for 1 percent of that

Dallas Burnett: 00:29:14

performance and they get paid for that.

Dallas Burnett: 00:29:16

So they're getting paid for their performance.

Dallas Burnett: 00:29:18

But most of their time is spent practicing.

Dallas Burnett: 00:29:20

And I love what you said, because it's true.

Dallas Burnett: 00:29:22

90 percent of our time that we get paid for is having to perform.

Dallas Burnett: 00:29:26

If you're a leader, most of your time, you're having to perform this leadership.

Dallas Burnett: 00:29:31

But if you're not even, if you're not able to sharpen the sword, you've got to find.

Dallas Burnett: 00:29:36

Ways and time to be intentional about sharpen the sword, because if an athlete

Dallas Burnett: 00:29:40

who's wanting to perform for 1 percent is practicing 90 percent and you've

Dallas Burnett: 00:29:44

got to be performing 90%, we've got to find some ways and times where we can

Dallas Burnett: 00:29:47

start practicing and getting better.

Dallas Burnett: 00:29:49

Some of that may be overlapping, like you were saying, it's at the dinner table.

Dallas Burnett: 00:29:53

it's integrating it into all aspects of your life.

Dallas Burnett: 00:29:55

Cause we've got to find ways to get better everywhere, so that

Dallas Burnett: 00:29:58

we can have time to do that.

Stacey Hanke: 00:29:59

we had, this was, this was a couple of months ago, it

Stacey Hanke: 00:30:02

was a VP of sales and my team was working with him and his sales team.

Stacey Hanke: 00:30:07

We started talking about how do you take your delivery skills, your behaviors, and

Stacey Hanke: 00:30:11

you interact with slide decks because they are pitching, they're pitching all the

Stacey Hanke: 00:30:15

time.

Stacey Hanke: 00:30:16

And we get to this portion, we, one of the big takeaways is you're the message.

Stacey Hanke: 00:30:21

Your deck is your backup.

Dallas Burnett: 00:30:24

Hmm.

Stacey Hanke: 00:30:24

you.

Stacey Hanke: 00:30:25

We got, how do you balance that conversation?

Stacey Hanke: 00:30:27

Right?

Stacey Hanke: 00:30:28

And at he, the VP, he slams the boardroom table, the boardroom that we're singing,

Stacey Hanke: 00:30:33

he's like, why haven't we thought of this?

Stacey Hanke: 00:30:35

We spend hours putting together our decks hours.

Stacey Hanke: 00:30:40

And then when we get in front of this potential client to pitch

Stacey Hanke: 00:30:42

to them, they don't see the hours we put in the deck, they

Stacey Hanke: 00:30:46

see our delivery and we never practice our delivery.

Dallas Burnett: 00:30:50

Ah.

Stacey Hanke: 00:30:51

And that's just

Stacey Hanke: 00:30:51

one example of many clients that have said to me, I just, I don't practice

Stacey Hanke: 00:30:57

because I don't have the time.

Stacey Hanke: 00:30:58

And I go, that's why finding the moments in your day of these random conversations

Stacey Hanke: 00:31:04

that you're having, that's practice.

Stacey Hanke: 00:31:07

Those are those practice times that you have instead of, I've

Stacey Hanke: 00:31:10

got to carve this out.

Stacey Hanke: 00:31:11

Well, no one has time.

Stacey Hanke: 00:31:13

We, how many of us can say at the end of the day, I had so much extra time today.

Stacey Hanke: 00:31:17

I don't even know what to do with it.

Dallas Burnett: 00:31:20

that's, yeah,

Stacey Hanke: 00:31:21

Maybe when we retire.

Stacey Hanke: 00:31:23

I don't know.

Stacey Hanke: 00:31:23

I don't know if that's what it's like

Dallas Burnett: 00:31:25

Yeah, maybe,

Stacey Hanke: 00:31:25

but

Dallas Burnett: 00:31:27

I don't know, we'll keep each other posted on that one.

Dallas Burnett: 00:31:30

I think your point to that, especially, it's so funny.

Dallas Burnett: 00:31:32

You said about sales and I think people, sometimes they don't realize

Dallas Burnett: 00:31:36

that, that is huge truth that you just dropped there literally this week.

Dallas Burnett: 00:31:40

I had a presentation from an organization, a company that we're

Dallas Burnett: 00:31:43

trying to sell me their services.

Dallas Burnett: 00:31:46

And, Everything looks so be well done.

Dallas Burnett: 00:31:48

They're branding messaging on point, very relational.

Dallas Burnett: 00:31:52

I was like, wow, . These guys are great.

Dallas Burnett: 00:31:54

And then said, well, let's set up this onboarding call and the main person

Dallas Burnett: 00:31:59

that they were wanting to work with me.

Dallas Burnett: 00:32:01

Didn't turn on the camera.

Dallas Burnett: 00:32:03

I've never met the person before was very Standoffish very kind of

Dallas Burnett: 00:32:08

condescending in the conversation.

Dallas Burnett: 00:32:10

and it was the exact opposite of Everything I had seen all the bright

Dallas Burnett: 00:32:14

and shiny and it was literally the way that they communicated did the

Dallas Burnett: 00:32:19

opposite we ultimately decided it wasn't a good fit and the reason simply

Dallas Burnett: 00:32:23

was the communication that pitch that you said that pitch It was not authentic.

Dallas Burnett: 00:32:29

It wasn't consistent with everything else.

Dallas Burnett: 00:32:32

And so it just brought up all these red flags, Whoa, what are we doing here?

Dallas Burnett: 00:32:35

this is not a good idea.

Dallas Burnett: 00:32:36

And so it's true.

Dallas Burnett: 00:32:37

It's like exactly what you said.

Dallas Burnett: 00:32:39

It's the message is important, but everybody's looking at the messenger.

Dallas Burnett: 00:32:43

It doesn't matter.

Dallas Burnett: 00:32:44

You're standing up, making a sales pitch.

Dallas Burnett: 00:32:45

It's going, you have to be, you have to be next level on that in

Dallas Burnett: 00:32:49

terms of influence and credibility.

Dallas Burnett: 00:32:50

So yeah.

Dallas Burnett: 00:32:51

I think it's true that when you were talking about that, I was just

Dallas Burnett: 00:32:53

thinking about that call this week.

Dallas Burnett: 00:32:55

I was like, wow, that literally just happened to me this week.

Dallas Burnett: 00:32:57

Well, let's talk about this because we, I want to, before we, before we have to

Dallas Burnett: 00:33:01

go, I want to get into one last thing.

Dallas Burnett: 00:33:03

I think our listeners were really.

Dallas Burnett: 00:33:04

Really enjoy.

Dallas Burnett: 00:33:06

We have the one on one coaching system.

Dallas Burnett: 00:33:08

We have a lot of clients that are using that to drive coaching

Dallas Burnett: 00:33:11

further down in their organization.

Dallas Burnett: 00:33:13

And so we have coaches all through these organizations that are leading

Dallas Burnett: 00:33:18

these coaching sessions and they're asking questions that one of the

Dallas Burnett: 00:33:21

things that we train them on, the questions are given to them.

Dallas Burnett: 00:33:24

So this

Dallas Burnett: 00:33:24

this six questions, three are always the same.

Dallas Burnett: 00:33:26

Three are always different.

Dallas Burnett: 00:33:27

And one of the things that coaches do, we say is this, they practice the

Dallas Burnett: 00:33:30

80 20 rule in this coaching system.

Dallas Burnett: 00:33:32

So they want the person they're coaching to speak 80 percent of the time.

Dallas Burnett: 00:33:36

And as a coach, they're only giving about 20

Dallas Burnett: 00:33:38

percent of the time giving feedback.

Dallas Burnett: 00:33:40

And so I want to talk about that as it relates to accountability

Dallas Burnett: 00:33:45

and trust, because we've talked about building trust, but one of

Dallas Burnett: 00:33:49

your talks is on accountability.

Dallas Burnett: 00:33:51

And so I just wanted to take the last few minutes.

Dallas Burnett: 00:33:53

that we have and talk about how do we do that?

Dallas Burnett: 00:33:57

Well, because I think some organizations could be like heavy

Dallas Burnett: 00:34:00

handed on the accountability and it feel like big brother.

Dallas Burnett: 00:34:03

And I think that other side, you can have no accountability.

Dallas Burnett: 00:34:05

And it's just the wild west.

Dallas Burnett: 00:34:06

So I know that's a lot, and I've talked about one on ones and

Dallas Burnett: 00:34:09

accountability, but I'd love to

Dallas Burnett: 00:34:10

open that up to, to talk through.

Stacey Hanke: 00:34:12

Yeah.

Stacey Hanke: 00:34:12

You know, there's one step I take before the actual interaction occurs.

Stacey Hanke: 00:34:18

I'll give you an example.

Stacey Hanke: 00:34:19

When someone calls me, an executive calls me and wants me to mentor

Stacey Hanke: 00:34:23

them, I always say to them, the mentoring does not work for you.

Stacey Hanke: 00:34:29

You need to work for it.

Stacey Hanke: 00:34:30

I just want to make sure that you've answered the question of why, now?

Stacey Hanke: 00:34:37

Why mentoring?

Stacey Hanke: 00:34:38

And why with me?

Stacey Hanke: 00:34:40

And in so many times, there's this look of, huh, I've never given that thought.

Stacey Hanke: 00:34:46

And it gives me a real good sense of, is this person ready to walk

Stacey Hanke: 00:34:51

this journey to make sure they get the return on investment?

Stacey Hanke: 00:34:54

My commitment, I tell every client, I don't take mentoring lightly.

Stacey Hanke: 00:34:58

I am messing with your career, with your personal life.

Stacey Hanke: 00:35:01

You've got to be all in, or it won't work.

Stacey Hanke: 00:35:05

My teachings won't work.

Dallas Burnett: 00:35:08

Right.

Stacey Hanke: 00:35:08

I think the accountability falls on, if I want to hold myself

Stacey Hanke: 00:35:12

accountable, that's my responsibility.

Stacey Hanke: 00:35:15

So from there, it's reaching out to who in your network and you can have as many

Stacey Hanke: 00:35:20

accountability partners as you want, who in your network you feel like is

Stacey Hanke: 00:35:24

going to show up, meaning when they are scheduled to meet with you, they show

Stacey Hanke: 00:35:28

up, they're ready to get meant to you

Dallas Burnett: 00:35:32

Hmm.

Dallas Burnett: 00:35:32

Hmm.

Stacey Hanke: 00:35:33

willing to tell you the truth.

Dallas Burnett: 00:35:35

Hmm.

Stacey Hanke: 00:35:35

so much of accountability to me is on myself and I get

Stacey Hanke: 00:35:40

it as a leader of my company.

Stacey Hanke: 00:35:43

Of course, I've got action steps and having those folks

Stacey Hanke: 00:35:46

hold themselves accountable.

Stacey Hanke: 00:35:48

But I'll give you an example.

Stacey Hanke: 00:35:49

We've got this accountability program right now within my team

Stacey Hanke: 00:35:52

and everyone's partnered up and we're just trying it for 90 days

Stacey Hanke: 00:35:55

and you're just with the one person.

Stacey Hanke: 00:35:57

And I said to my accountability partner, I said to her, what do you want?

Stacey Hanke: 00:36:01

You tell me.

Stacey Hanke: 00:36:03

You tell me exactly what you want and how you want me to do it, and

Stacey Hanke: 00:36:06

then I'll figure out the rest.

Stacey Hanke: 00:36:08

So it's this two way street, and I think sometimes, I get it, leader

Stacey Hanke: 00:36:13

and then the teams that they lead.

Stacey Hanke: 00:36:15

But if we're talking about individual accountability, that to

Stacey Hanke: 00:36:18

me is really your responsibility.

Stacey Hanke: 00:36:21

Anytime I mentor someone, I say to them at the end of the mentoring session to

Stacey Hanke: 00:36:25

prepare for the next one, I'll say to them, here's my thought based on where

Stacey Hanke: 00:36:29

I see you are right now and what we'll cover next time, but it's up to you.

Stacey Hanke: 00:36:33

So when we meet, you're just going to come to the table to tell me what you've been

Stacey Hanke: 00:36:37

practicing and what do you want more of?

Dallas Burnett: 00:36:40

right,

Stacey Hanke: 00:36:41

and to me, that changes that it's not leader micromanaging.

Stacey Hanke: 00:36:48

there's a

Stacey Hanke: 00:36:48

difference.

Stacey Hanke: 00:36:49

The

Stacey Hanke: 00:36:49

accountability is now a partnership.

Dallas Burnett: 00:36:53

yes,

Stacey Hanke: 00:36:53

It's similar to if you ever had a personal trainer in your

Stacey Hanke: 00:36:57

life or a workout buddy, if they're waiting at your front doorstep at 5 AM

Stacey Hanke: 00:37:03

to go for the run, the walk, whatever you're putting your feet on the floor

Stacey Hanke: 00:37:07

out of your, you're going to be there.

Dallas Burnett: 00:37:10

yes,

Stacey Hanke: 00:37:11

But it's this

Stacey Hanke: 00:37:11

two way street, I think about, I have a personal trainer.

Stacey Hanke: 00:37:14

I go to him very early this morning.

Stacey Hanke: 00:37:16

I was there and we were joking.

Stacey Hanke: 00:37:18

I said to him, I go, I don't know.

Stacey Hanke: 00:37:20

I come here twice a week and I know the torture.

Stacey Hanke: 00:37:23

I know what's going to happen, but it's still on me.

Stacey Hanke: 00:37:27

Like he'll set the layout, the workout, but he'll always say to me, how

Stacey Hanke: 00:37:31

much are you going to go in today?

Dallas Burnett: 00:37:33

yeah,

Stacey Hanke: 00:37:34

He'll, he'll guide me.

Stacey Hanke: 00:37:36

and to me that's the part I think it also builds when you can create that

Stacey Hanke: 00:37:39

type of partnership leader to employee or

Stacey Hanke: 00:37:43

vice versa.

Stacey Hanke: 00:37:44

And that leader also is it appropriate relationship where you can say,

Stacey Hanke: 00:37:49

all right, so I'm going to be, I'll be your accountability partner.

Stacey Hanke: 00:37:51

I love for you to be mine as well.

Dallas Burnett: 00:37:54

um,

Stacey Hanke: 00:37:55

I know that's a big step for some people, but there's a difference

Stacey Hanke: 00:37:59

then between leader managing their people versus an accountability partner.

Dallas Burnett: 00:38:05

yes.

Dallas Burnett: 00:38:06

I think that's such good.

Dallas Burnett: 00:38:07

Advice.

Dallas Burnett: 00:38:08

And I think as it relates to our coaching system, that 20%, a lot of times is

Dallas Burnett: 00:38:13

the time the coach takes to lean in

Dallas Burnett: 00:38:16

to the conversation, it's to say, I'm here, I hear you made that

Dallas Burnett: 00:38:20

commitment for the next 30 days.

Dallas Burnett: 00:38:22

Is that what you really want?

Dallas Burnett: 00:38:23

Is that what you really want to do for the next 30 days?

Dallas Burnett: 00:38:25

Are you committed to doing that?

Dallas Burnett: 00:38:26

Are you really?

Dallas Burnett: 00:38:27

Cause last month we did this and now, you know, I kind of felt like you were Are you

Dallas Burnett: 00:38:31

committed to doing this the next 30 days?

Dallas Burnett: 00:38:33

That comes a lot easier when that person knows and hears that you're

Dallas Burnett: 00:38:36

doing that because you care about them because you're authentic, because you're

Dallas Burnett: 00:38:39

consistent and because you're leaning into what they want, how they want to.

Dallas Burnett: 00:38:45

To move towards that and you're being a resource for them.

Dallas Burnett: 00:38:47

So I think that's really great advice.

Dallas Burnett: 00:38:49

very great advice.

Dallas Burnett: 00:38:50

Well, listen, Stacey, we always ask our guests a couple of

Dallas Burnett: 00:38:54

questions at the end of every show.

Dallas Burnett: 00:38:56

And this has been fantastic, by the way.

Dallas Burnett: 00:38:58

the line, the one liner that stuck with me is what doesn't

Dallas Burnett: 00:39:00

challenge you won't change you.

Dallas Burnett: 00:39:01

Oh, that was good.

Dallas Burnett: 00:39:03

That was

Stacey Hanke: 00:39:03

I know that.

Stacey Hanke: 00:39:04

hurts, doesn't

Dallas Burnett: 00:39:05

So, oh yes, my, my man, that steps on my toes.

Dallas Burnett: 00:39:08

My toes are bleeding right now because of that.

Dallas Burnett: 00:39:10

Oh, so good.

Dallas Burnett: 00:39:12

And the best of ways.

Dallas Burnett: 00:39:12

So we always ask your guests a couple of questions.

Dallas Burnett: 00:39:15

Number one, if people want to book you for a speaking engagement or

Dallas Burnett: 00:39:18

check out your new book that's coming out in October, how do people find

Dallas Burnett: 00:39:22

out more information about you?

Stacey Hanke: 00:39:23

The website says a great place to start and it's my name on it.

Stacey Hanke: 00:39:27

So it's Stacy hunky inc.

Stacey Hanke: 00:39:29

com

Stacey Hanke: 00:39:30

and then on the site or just Google me and we are heavily into social media our

Stacey Hanke: 00:39:35

value system there is to share value.

Stacey Hanke: 00:39:38

We're constantly pumping out resources.

Stacey Hanke: 00:39:40

Obviously we're pumping out nuggets right now about the book.

Stacey Hanke: 00:39:44

That's a great place.

Stacey Hanke: 00:39:45

If you want to follow us from afar.

Dallas Burnett: 00:39:48

And, social media, the most active presence you're on.

Dallas Burnett: 00:39:50

Are you, is

Dallas Burnett: 00:39:51

it LinkedIn, Instagram, LinkedIn?

Dallas Burnett: 00:39:52

Okay,

Dallas Burnett: 00:39:53

great.

Stacey Hanke: 00:39:53

Those are the top two.

Dallas Burnett: 00:39:55

We'll put those links in the show notes, so you guys can have that.

Dallas Burnett: 00:39:58

And last question we always ask our guests is who would you like

Dallas Burnett: 00:40:02

to hear as a guest on the last 10%?

Stacey Hanke: 00:40:05

Yeah.

Stacey Hanke: 00:40:06

Can you get Simon Sinek?

Stacey Hanke: 00:40:07

That's a

Dallas Burnett: 00:40:11

that, that will be awesome.

Dallas Burnett: 00:40:12

Yeah.

Dallas Burnett: 00:40:13

we'll keep that on the list for sure.

Dallas Burnett: 00:40:15

yeah, we'll put a call in his, our people will call his people.

Dallas Burnett: 00:40:17

We'll see

Dallas Burnett: 00:40:18

if we can make that one.

Dallas Burnett: 00:40:18

No,

Stacey Hanke: 00:40:19

answer right

Dallas Burnett: 00:40:20

I love it.

Dallas Burnett: 00:40:20

Yes.

Dallas Burnett: 00:40:21

surely he will.

Dallas Burnett: 00:40:22

we have so much in common.

Dallas Burnett: 00:40:23

no, that's awesome.

Dallas Burnett: 00:40:23

I love Simon and read a lot of his books.

Dallas Burnett: 00:40:26

And yeah,

Stacey Hanke: 00:40:26

can I share one real quick final thought about that?

Stacey Hanke: 00:40:30

this kind of sums up everything that we've done.

Stacey Hanke: 00:40:32

I had heard him on a podcast, one of his many, and he shares

Stacey Hanke: 00:40:37

how he was at a conference.

Stacey Hanke: 00:40:39

Phil Knight was presenting at this conference from Nike

Stacey Hanke: 00:40:42

at some point during Phil Knight's presentation, he

Stacey Hanke: 00:40:45

asked the audience stand up.

Stacey Hanke: 00:40:49

If you work out, you run for a workout at least once a week and the majority of

Stacey Hanke: 00:40:56

the audience stands up, stay standing.

Stacey Hanke: 00:40:59

If you run at least twice a week for exercise, a lot of people sat down.

Stacey Hanke: 00:41:06

Finally, stay standing.

Stacey Hanke: 00:41:07

If rain or shine, light or dark, you run at least three times a week for exercise.

Stacey Hanke: 00:41:17

A lot of people sit down.

Stacey Hanke: 00:41:17

There's not many people left standing.

Stacey Hanke: 00:41:19

And he said to those that were left standing, he said, when it's dark, it's

Stacey Hanke: 00:41:23

cold and it's raining and you're out there by yourself for your run and you

Stacey Hanke: 00:41:28

happen to run past that street lamp.

Stacey Hanke: 00:41:31

Think of us standing underneath that lamp cheering you on.

Dallas Burnett: 00:41:35

Oh, that's

Stacey Hanke: 00:41:36

And Simon Sinek comes in and he said, you know what Phil

Stacey Hanke: 00:41:38

Knight was doing right then and there?

Stacey Hanke: 00:41:40

He was defining what their brand Nike's brand just do it is.

Stacey Hanke: 00:41:46

And I made that reference a little earlier in this podcast.

Stacey Hanke: 00:41:48

It's you don't need to be in the next Olympic track and field.

Stacey Hanke: 00:41:53

You just have to do it.

Stacey Hanke: 00:41:55

And that's a great way to just summarize everything that you and I covered.

Dallas Burnett: 00:42:01

love it.

Dallas Burnett: 00:42:01

Stacey, that is just fantastic and so motivating, inspiring.

Dallas Burnett: 00:42:05

I think so much of your conversation has been, I know our

Dallas Burnett: 00:42:09

listeners have really enjoyed it.

Dallas Burnett: 00:42:10

Congratulations on the new book as an author.

Dallas Burnett: 00:42:13

I know how brutal that process is.

Dallas Burnett: 00:42:15

We were talking about the show or the show.

Dallas Burnett: 00:42:16

And so anybody that comes out in the book, I'm like, I got.

Dallas Burnett: 00:42:19

I got props cause that's, that is so much work.

Dallas Burnett: 00:42:22

And so wish you the best of luck on the launch and happy to support you in that.

Dallas Burnett: 00:42:26

Thank you for sharing it.

Dallas Burnett: 00:42:27

Thank you for being on the last 10%.

Stacey Hanke: 00:42:29

So good.

Stacey Hanke: 00:42:29

So blessed to get a chance to meet you.

Stacey Hanke: 00:42:31

Thank you.